{"id":5040,"date":"2020-09-15T02:05:13","date_gmt":"2020-09-15T02:05:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/?p=5040"},"modified":"2020-11-21T02:47:56","modified_gmt":"2020-11-21T02:47:56","slug":"tam-ly-ung-dung-trong-hon-nhan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/?p=5040","title":{"rendered":"T\u00e2m L\u00fd \u1ee8ng D\u1ee5ng Trong H\u00f4n Nh\u00e2n<\/strong>
TS Tr\u1ea7n M\u1ef9 Duy\u1ec7t<\/span>"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

T\u00d4N TR\u1eccNG V\u00c0 B\u00c0N H\u1eceI TRONG T\u1eeaNG V\u1ea4N \u0110\u1ec0 TR\u01af\u1edaC KHI QUY\u1ebeT \u0110\u1ecaNH<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

TS Tr\u1ea7n M\u1ef9 Duy\u1ec7t<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ch\u1ed3ng c\u1ee7a em r\u1ea5t th\u01b0\u01a1ng y\u00eau em v\u00e0 lo l\u1eafng cho gia \u0111\u00ecnh, nh\u01b0ng anh \u1ea5y c\u00f3 th\u00f3i quen th\u00edch c\u00e1i g\u00ec l\u00e0 t\u1ef1 \u0111i l\u00e0m m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng b\u00e0n h\u1ecfi v\u1edbi em m\u1ed9t v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 g\u00ec h\u1ebft, v\u00e0 em l\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi sau c\u00f9ng bi\u1ebft chuy\u1ec7n \u1ea5y khi n\u00f3 \u0111\u00e3 x\u1ea3y ra b\u1ea5t lu\u1eadn t\u1ed1t hay x\u1ea5u. Nh\u1eefng l\u00fac nh\u01b0 v\u1eady em h\u1ecfi t\u1ea1i sao anh kh\u00f4ng b\u00e0n v\u1edbi em, th\u00ec anh \u1ea5y n\u00f3ng gi\u1eadn v\u00e0 b\u1ecf \u0111i kh\u00f4ng th\u00e8m nghe em ph\u00e2n t\u00edch \u0111\u00fang hay sai.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trong tr\u01b0\u1eddng h\u1ee3p n\u00e0y em ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0m g\u00ec, v\u00e0 anh \u1ea5y ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0m g\u00ec \u0111\u1ec3 v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng c\u00f3 s\u1ef1 h\u00f2a h\u1ee3p v\u00e0 bi\u1ebft t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng nhau, hi\u1ec3u nhau nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

V\u1ea5n n\u1ea1n v\u1eeba n\u00eau tr\u00ean c\u00f3 l\u1ebd nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi trong ch\u00fang ta \u0111\u00e3 t\u1eebng nghe qua, v\u00e0 c\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u00e3 x\u1ea3y ra cho ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh, trong gia \u0111\u00ecnh m\u00ecnh. \u0110\u1ec3 gi\u1ea3i quy\u1ebft v\u1ea5n n\u1ea1n n\u00e0y, thi\u1ebft t\u01b0\u1edfng n\u00ean \u00f4n l\u1ea1i l\u1eddi khuy\u00ean v\u00e0 kinh nghi\u1ec7m c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi x\u01b0a trong t\u01b0\u01a1ng quan v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng. Cha \u00f4ng ta v\u1eabn th\u01b0\u1eddng khuy\u00ean: \u201cT\u01b0\u01a1ng k\u00ednh nh\u01b0 t\u00e2n\u201d. C\u00f3 ngh\u0129a l\u00e0 c\u1ea3 v\u1ee3 l\u1eabn ch\u1ed3ng \u0111\u1ec1u ph\u1ea3i t\u1ebf nh\u1ecb, nh\u00fan nh\u01b0\u1eddng, \u0111\u1ed1i x\u1eed v\u1edbi nhau nh\u01b0 nh\u1eefng ng\u00e0y \u0111\u1ea7u m\u1edbi quen bi\u1ebft, m\u1edbi l\u00e0 v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng. Kinh nghi\u1ec7m s\u1ed1ng qu\u00ed gi\u00e1 n\u00e0y kh\u00f4ng h\u1ec1 l\u1ed7i th\u1eddi so v\u1edbi th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf v\u00e0 \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng \u1edf th\u1eddi \u0111\u1ea1i ch\u00fang ta. Trong l\u1eddi th\u1ec1 h\u00f4n \u01b0\u1edbc, tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi tr\u1edf th\u00e0nh v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng, ch\u00fang ta \u0111\u00e3 th\u1ec1 h\u1ee9a \u201cy\u00eau th\u01b0\u01a1ng v\u00e0 t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng nhau\u201d. Hai ch\u1eef y\u00eau th\u01b0\u01a1ng v\u00e0 t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng l\u00e0 hai y\u1ebfu t\u1ed1 c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i l\u00e0m n\u00ean \u00fd ngh\u0129a c\u1ee7a h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trong h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n, s\u1ef1 t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c di\u1ec5n t\u1ea3 qua nh\u1eefng trao \u0111\u1ed5i, chia s\u1ebb, v\u00e0 khuy\u1ebfn kh\u00edch l\u1eabn nhau. Th\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a anh l\u00e0 th\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i c\u1ee7a em, th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng c\u1ee7a em c\u0169ng l\u00e0 th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng c\u1ee7a anh, \u0111\u00fang v\u1edbi \u00fd ngh\u0129a: \u201cC\u1ee7a ch\u1ed3ng c\u00f4ng v\u1ee3\u201d. Do \u0111\u00f3, b\u00e0n h\u1ecfi nhau, chia s\u1ebb v\u1edbi nhau, v\u00e0 c\u00f9ng g\u00f3p \u00fd cho nhau l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch s\u1ed1ng h\u00e0i h\u00f2a gi\u1eefa hai v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng. Trong th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf, nguy\u00ean t\u1eafc \u201chai c\u00e1i \u0111\u1ea7u v\u1eabn h\u01a1n m\u1ed9t c\u00e1i \u0111\u1ea7u\u201d lu\u00f4n lu\u00f4n \u0111\u00fang. Nhi\u1ec1u khi ch\u1ec9 c\u1ea7n m\u1ed9t \u00fd ki\u1ebfn nh\u1ecf c\u1ee7a v\u1ee3 hay c\u1ee7a ch\u1ed3ng m\u00e0 k\u1ebft qu\u1ea3 tr\u1edf n\u00ean kh\u00e1c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

L\u1ed1i v\u00e0o c\u1ee7a t\u00e2m h\u1ed3n<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trong Johari Window (C\u1eeda S\u1ed5 Johari), m\u1ed9t d\u1ee5ng c\u1ee5 kh\u1ea3o s\u00e1t t\u00e2m l\u00fd do Joseph Luft v\u00e0 Harry Ingham \u0111\u00e3 gi\u1edbi thi\u1ec7u n\u0103m 1955, nh\u1eb1m kh\u1ea3o s\u00e1t s\u1ef1 hi\u1ec3u bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh, s\u1ef1 ph\u00e1t tri\u1ec3n c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n v\u00e0 gi\u00fap gia t\u0103ng nh\u1eefng trao \u0111\u1ed5i th\u01b0\u1eddng ng\u00e0y v\u1edbi ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c. Theo \u0111\u00f3, nh\u1eefng g\u00ec m\u00e0 ch\u00fang ta ch\u01b0a bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c d\u00f9 \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 v\u1ee3 hay ch\u1ed3ng r\u1ea5t nhi\u1ec1u. \u0110\u1ec3 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 ph\u1ea7n n\u00e0o hi\u1ec3u \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c nh\u1eefng kh\u00e1c bi\u1ec7t v\u00e0 b\u00ed \u1ea9n \u1ea5y, ch\u00fang ta th\u1eed nh\u00ecn v\u00e0o m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ed1i ng\u1eabu xuy\u00ean qua 4 c\u00e1nh c\u1eeda sau \u0111\u00e2y: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

1-Nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u ta bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c c\u0169ng bi\u1ebft (Open self):<\/em>
Qua c\u1eeda s\u1ed5 n\u00e0y, b\u1ea1n nh\u00ecn th\u1ea5y m\u00ecnh v\u1edbi nh\u1eefng \u01b0u v\u00e0 khuy\u1ebft \u0111i\u1ec3m. C\u00f9ng m\u1ed9t l\u01b0\u1ee3t, ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ed1i ng\u1eabu c\u1ee7a b\u1ea1n c\u0169ng nh\u00ecn th\u1ea5y nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u \u1ea5y nh\u01b0 ch\u00ednh b\u1ea1n nh\u00ecn b\u1ea1n. C\u00e1i bi\u1ebft n\u00e0y l\u00e0 m\u1ea5u ch\u1ed1t l\u00e0m n\u00ean s\u1ef1 h\u00e0i h\u00f2a trong \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng gia \u0111\u00ecnh, \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2-Nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 ta m\u00e0 m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft (Blind self):<\/em>
\u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 g\u00f3c khu\u1ea5t v\u1ec1 con ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u1ee7a m\u1ed7i ng\u01b0\u1eddi. Th\u00f4ng th\u01b0\u1eddng b\u1ea1n kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft v\u00ec b\u1ecb che d\u1ea5u b\u1edfi t\u1ef1 \u00e1i, b\u1edfi c\u00e1i t\u00f4i qu\u00e1 l\u1edbn. N\u00f3 th\u01b0\u1eddng ng\u0103n tr\u1edf b\u1ea1n ch\u1ea5p nh\u1eadn l\u1eddi nh\u1eadn x\u00e9t, ph\u00ea b\u00ecnh, ho\u1eb7c s\u1eeda sai c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c. Nh\u01b0ng theo Tu\u00e2n T\u1eed th\u00ec: \u201cAi s\u1eeda cho ta \u0111\u00fang, ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 th\u1ea7y ta\u201d.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

3-Nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u ta bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh m\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft (Hidden self):<\/em>
\u0110\u00e2y ch\u00ednh l\u00e0 l\u00fd do \u0111\u1ec3 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c hi\u1ec3u l\u1ea7m ho\u1eb7c ph\u00ea ph\u00e1n b\u1ea1n m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch v\u00f4 c\u0103n c\u1ee9 v\u00e0 b\u1ea5t c\u00f4ng. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi thi\u1ebfu tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh, thi\u1ebfu t\u1ef1 tin s\u1ebd c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y r\u1ea5t kh\u00f3 ch\u1ecbu v\u00e0 th\u01b0\u1eddng hay ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c \u0111\u1ec3 b\u1ea3o v\u1ec7 m\u00ecnh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4-Nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u m\u00e0 c\u1ea3 ta c\u0169ng nh\u01b0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft (Unkown self):<\/em>
G\u1ed3m nh\u1eefng g\u00ec m\u00e0 ch\u00ednh b\u1ea1n c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh, v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft. Nh\u1eadn x\u00e9t v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh hay m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c trong nh\u1eefng tr\u01b0\u1eddng h\u1ee3p n\u00e0y r\u1ea5t v\u00f5 \u0111o\u00e1n, ch\u1ee7 quan. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi b\u1ecb ph\u00ea ph\u00e1n, b\u1ecb ch\u1ec9 tr\u00edch s\u1ebd r\u1ea5t hoang mang, b\u1ef1c b\u1ed9i.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf \u0111\u00e3 minh ch\u1ee9ng, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i h\u1ec5 ngh\u0129 m\u00ecnh bi\u1ebft l\u00e0 bi\u1ebft h\u1ebft m\u1ecdi s\u1ef1 d\u00f9 l\u00e0 bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh. C\u0169ng v\u1eady, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i h\u1ec5 l\u00e0 v\u1ee3 hay ch\u1ed3ng l\u00e0 bi\u1ebft \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ed1i ng\u1eabu c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh ngh\u0129 g\u00ec v\u00e0 l\u00e0m g\u00ec. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi Vi\u1ec7t Nam c\u00f3 m\u1ed9t c\u00e2u n\u00f3i di\u1ec5n t\u1ea3 t\u00ednh ch\u1ee7 quan v\u00e0 ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c v\u1ec1 nh\u1eefng c\u00e1i bi\u1ebft n\u00e0y: \u201cT\u00f4i \u0111i gu\u1ed1c trong b\u1ee5ng \u00f4ng hay b\u00e0\u201d. Th\u1eadt ra c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u \u0111i\u1ec1u ch\u00ednh ta c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh, v\u00e0 c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng hay v\u1ee3 c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh. Nh\u1eefng g\u00ec ch\u00fang ta bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 m\u00ecnh hay v\u1ec1 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c c\u0169ng ch\u1ec9 50% s\u1ef1 th\u1eadt, ph\u1ea7n c\u00f2n l\u1ea1i \u0111\u00f2i h\u1ecfi ph\u1ea3i c\u00f3 nh\u1eefng cu\u1ed9c tr\u00f2 truy\u1ec7n, trao \u0111\u1ed5i, chia s\u1ebb. \u0110i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y c\u0169ng \u00e1p d\u1ee5ng trong nh\u1eefng giao ti\u1ebfp x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i v\u00e0 b\u1ea1n b\u00e8.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Theo t\u00e2m l\u00fd h\u1ecdc, trao \u0111\u1ed5i, chia s\u1ebb (communication) l\u00e0 ngh\u1ec7 thu\u1eadt hi\u1ec3u v\u00e0 \u0111i v\u00e0o l\u00f2ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi. N\u00f3 c\u0169ng l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ph\u01b0\u01a1ng ph\u00e1p tr\u1ecb li\u1ec7u v\u1ec1 nh\u1eefng b\u1ea5t \u0111\u1ed3ng, b\u1ea5t h\u00f2a trong \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n. \u1ede m\u1ed9t c\u00e1i nh\u00ecn t\u00edch c\u1ef1c, nh\u1eefng nh\u1eadn x\u00e9t d\u00f9 l\u00e0m ch\u00fang ta kh\u00f4ng h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c v\u1eabn mang \u00fd ngh\u0129a ng\u0103n ng\u1eeba ho\u1eb7c \u0111\u1ec1 ph\u00f2ng. Ng\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ea1i, n\u1ebfu nh\u1eefng chia s\u1ebb, g\u00f3p \u00fd \u1ea5y l\u00e0 \u0111\u00fang th\u00ec c\u00e0ng th\u00eam n\u0103ng l\u1ef1c v\u00e0 h\u1eadu thu\u1eabn t\u1ed1t cho h\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh: \u201cThu\u1eadn v\u1ee3 thu\u1eadn ch\u1ed3ng, t\u00e1t bi\u1ec3n \u0110\u00f4ng c\u0169ng c\u1ea1n.\u201d Kinh nghi\u1ec7m cho th\u1ea5y ph\u1ea7n l\u1edbn nh\u1eefng th\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i, nh\u1eefng cu\u1ed9c c\u00e3i v\u00e3 l\u00e0 do ch\u1ee7 quan kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u00f3n nh\u1eadn \u00fd ki\u1ebfn hay s\u1ef1 g\u00f3p \u00fd c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u1ea2nh h\u01b0\u1edfng x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

T\u1eadp qu\u00e1n t\u1ef1 quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng trong v\u1ea5n n\u1ea1n tr\u00ean, c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ebfn t\u1eeb t\u01b0 t\u01b0\u1edfng cho r\u1eb1ng b\u00e0n h\u1ecfi v\u1edbi v\u1ee3 s\u1ebd mang ti\u1ebfng m\u00ecnh d\u1ed1t, m\u00ecnh k\u00e9m, ho\u1eb7c kh\u00f4ng th\u00f4ng minh b\u1eb1ng v\u1ee3! N\u00f3 cho ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng c\u1ea3m t\u01b0\u1edfng thua thi\u1ec7t l\u00e0m m\u1ea5t m\u1eb7t nam nhi, m\u1ea5t m\u1eb7t tr\u01b0\u1ee3ng phu, m\u1ea5t m\u1eb7t \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng, v\u00e0 s\u1ebd l\u00e0m c\u1edb cho v\u1ee3 khinh th\u01b0\u1eddng, kh\u00f4ng t\u00f4n tr\u1ecdng m\u00ecnh. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t trong nh\u1eefng m\u1eb7c c\u1ea3m t\u1ef1 ty m\u00e0 ch\u00fang ta v\u1eabn th\u1ea5y trong nhi\u1ec1u gia \u0111\u00ecnh Vi\u1ec7t Nam, \u0111\u1eb7c bi\u1ec7t, trong n\u1ec1n v\u0103n h\u00f3a tr\u1ecdng nam khinh n\u1eef, \u0111\u1ec1 cao l\u1ed1i s\u1ed1ng gia tr\u01b0\u1edfng. Ngo\u00e0i ra, \u0111\u1ecbnh ki\u1ebfn n\u00e0y c\u00f2n \u1ea3nh h\u01b0\u1edfng b\u1edfi m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i, b\u1ea1n b\u00e8. Th\u00ed d\u1ee5, s\u1ee3 b\u1ea1n b\u00e8 cho l\u00e0 thua v\u1ee3, s\u1ee3 v\u1ee3, hay n\u1ea5p b\u00f3ng v\u1ee3, m\u1eb7c d\u00f9 trong th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng thua k\u00e9m v\u1ee3 c\u1ea3 v\u1ec1 ki\u1ebfn th\u1ee9c l\u1eabn kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng chuy\u00ean m\u00f4n. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

C\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 vi\u1ec7c n\u00e0y x\u1ea3y ra v\u00ec nh\u1eefng quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh d\u00f9 nh\u1ecf m\u1ecdn m\u00e0 v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng v\u00ec ghen t\u01b0\u01a1ng, nghi ng\u1edd v\u00e0 mu\u1ed1n ki\u1ec3m so\u00e1t nhau n\u00ean cho \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 l\u1edbn lao, quan tr\u1ecdng r\u1ed3i t\u1ef1 m\u00ecnh kh\u00f3 ch\u1ecbu v\u1edbi m\u00ecnh c\u0169ng nh\u01b0 v\u1edbi ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ed1i ng\u1eabu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tr\u00ean ph\u01b0\u01a1ng di\u1ec7n t\u00e2m sinh l\u00fd, n\u00f3 c\u0169ng \u0111\u1ebfn t\u1eeb s\u1ef1 kh\u00e1c bi\u1ec7t v\u1ec1 c\u1ea5u tr\u00fac c\u1ee7a n\u00e3o b\u1ed9 gi\u1eefa ng\u01b0\u1eddi nam v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi n\u1eef. C\u00f3 \u0111\u1ebfn 80-90% ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef s\u1ed1ng v\u1edbi n\u00e3o c\u1ea7u tr\u00e1i c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh, trong khi 80-90% nam gi\u1edbi s\u1ed1ng v\u1edbi n\u00e3o c\u1ea7u ph\u1ea3i. M\u1ed9t \u0111\u00e0ng nghi\u00eang v\u1ec1 t\u00ecnh c\u1ea3m, \u0111\u1eb7t n\u1eb7ng nh\u1eefng c\u00e1i nh\u00ecn v\u00e0 ph\u00e1n \u0111o\u00e1n theo c\u1ea3m x\u00fac, rung \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u1ee7a con tim. M\u1ed9t \u0111\u00e0ng nghi\u00eang v\u1ec1 l\u00fd tr\u00ed, d\u1ef1a tr\u00ean nh\u1eefng l\u00fd lu\u1eadn v\u00e0 ph\u00e1n \u0111o\u00e1n c\u1ee7a kh\u1ed1i \u00f3c. Nh\u01b0ng con \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng t\u1eeb kh\u1ed1i \u00f3c xu\u1ed1ng tr\u00e1i tim hay t\u1eeb tr\u00e1i tim l\u00ean kh\u1ed1i \u00f3c tuy g\u1ea7n nh\u01b0ng r\u1ea5t d\u00e0i, r\u1ea5t xa nhi\u1ec1u khi kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec3m \u0111\u1ebfn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sau c\u00f9ng v\u0103n h\u00f3a nam n\u1eef b\u00ecnh \u0111\u1eb3ng, chia s\u1ebb \u0111\u1ed3ng \u0111\u1ec1u trong \u0111\u1eddi s\u1ed1ng h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t v\u0103n h\u00f3a m\u1edbi m\u1ebb, \u00edt th\u1ea5y trong sinh ho\u1ea1t gia \u0111\u00ecnh ng\u01b0\u1eddi Vi\u1ec7t. Nh\u01b0 \u0111\u00e3 di\u1ec5n t\u1ea3 \u1edf tr\u00ean, v\u00ec ph\u1ea3n \u1ea3nh v\u0103n h\u00f3a \u201ctr\u1ecdng nam khinh n\u1eef\u201d, v\u0103n h\u00f3a \u201cgia tr\u01b0\u1edfng\u201d, n\u00ean ph\u1ea7n \u0111\u00f4ng \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng, ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng Vi\u1ec7t Nam bao gi\u1edd c\u0169ng cho m\u00ecnh \u0111\u00fang. Th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf, trong cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng ch\u00fang ta r\u1ea5t \u00edt khi th\u1ea5y ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng Vi\u1ec7t Nam n\u00f3i l\u1eddi \u201cxin l\u1ed7i\u201d v\u1ee3 con khi c\u00f3 l\u1ed7i. C\u00e0ng hi\u1ebfm th\u1ea5y h\u1ecd n\u00f3i l\u1eddi \u201cc\u00e1m \u01a1n\u201d khi v\u1ee3 con l\u00e0m g\u00ec cho h\u1ecd. M\u1ed9t t\u00e2m tr\u00ed h\u1ea1n h\u1eb9p m\u00e0 l\u1ea1i lu\u00f4n cho m\u00ecnh l\u00e0 \u0111\u00fang th\u00ec v\u1ea5p ph\u1ea3i nh\u1eefng l\u1ed7i ph\u1ea1m, sai l\u1ea7m l\u00e0 chuy\u1ec7n th\u01b0\u1eddng. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng Vi\u1ec7t Nam c\u1ea7n h\u1ecdc n\u00f3i l\u1eddi xin l\u1ed7i khi l\u00e0m \u0111i\u1ec1u l\u1ed7i kh\u00f4ng nh\u1eefng v\u1edbi v\u1ee3 m\u00e0 c\u1ea3 v\u1edbi con c\u00e1i n\u1eefa . T\u00edch c\u1ef1c h\u01a1n l\u00e0 ph\u1ea3i bi\u1ebft n\u00f3i l\u1eddi c\u00e1m \u01a1n v\u1ec1 nh\u1eefng vi\u1ec7c m\u00e0 v\u1ee3 con m\u00ecnh \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0m cho m\u00ecnh. B\u00ed quy\u1ebft h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n n\u1eb1m \u1edf ch\u1ed7 bi\u1ebft n\u00f3i v\u00e0 th\u1ef1c h\u00e0nh hai ti\u1ebfng \u201cc\u00e1m \u01a1n\u201d v\u00e0 \u201cxin l\u1ed7i\u201d. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u1ee3 m\u1ea5t m\u1eb7t, s\u1ee3 mang ti\u1ebfng thua k\u00e9m v\u1ee3, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 l\u00fd do \u0111\u1ec3 ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng t\u1ef1 quy\u1ebft nh\u1eefng v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 trong gia \u0111\u00ecnh. Gia \u0111\u00ecnh l\u00e0 gia \u0111\u00ecnh chung, thua \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u00e0 thua \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c chung, v\u00e0 h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac l\u00e0 h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac chung. Trong h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 th\u1ee9 h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac hay th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng m\u1ed9t m\u00ecnh. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta th\u01b0\u1eddng n\u00f3i: \u201cSau l\u01b0ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng th\u00e0nh c\u00f4ng lu\u00f4n c\u00f3 b\u00f3ng d\u00e1ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef\u201d. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef \u1ea5y kh\u00f4ng ai kh\u00e1c l\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi v\u1ee3. \u0110\u00e2y \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c coi nh\u01b0 m\u1ed9t ch\u00e2n l\u00fd d\u00f9 ai \u0111\u00f3 c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n lo\u1ea1i b\u1ecf nh\u01b0ng v\u1eabn kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c. Vi\u1ec7c b\u00e0n h\u1ecfi, chia s\u1ebb l\u00e0 vi\u1ec7c n\u00ean l\u00e0m v\u00e0 c\u1ea7n l\u00e0m. \u0110\u1eb7t tr\u01b0\u1eddng h\u1ee3p n\u1ebfu nh\u1eefng k\u1ebft qu\u1ea3 x\u1ea3y ra kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c nh\u01b0 \u00fd, \u00edt nh\u1ea5t ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e3nh tr\u00e1ch nhi\u1ec7m m\u1ed9t m\u00ecnh. Ng\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u1ea1i, c\u00f3 s\u1ef1 san s\u1ebb v\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed3ng c\u1ea3m c\u1ee7a c\u1ea3 hai v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng: \u201c\u0110\u1ed3ng v\u1ee3, \u0111\u1ed3ng ch\u1ed3ng\u201d. H\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ed9ng n\u00e0y kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 g\u00ec x\u1ea5u, kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m gi\u1ea3m gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng. V\u00e0 c\u0169ng kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ee7 nh\u1eadn quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh ch\u00ednh \u0111\u00e1ng trong gia \u0111\u00ecnh nhi\u1ec1u l\u00fac thu\u1ed9c v\u1ec1 ng\u01b0\u1eddi ch\u1ed3ng l\u00e0 c\u1ed9t tr\u1ee5 c\u1ee7a gia \u0111\u00ecnh. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

B\u00ed quy\u1ebft h\u1ea1nh ph\u00fac trong h\u00f4n nh\u00e2n<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

T\u00f3m l\u1ea1i, tr\u01b0\u1eddng h\u1ee3p hai v\u1ee3 ch\u1ed3ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c n\u00eau l\u00ean trong v\u1ea5n n\u1ea1n tr\u00ean r\u00f5 r\u00e0ng \u0111\u00e3 g\u1eb7p ph\u1ea3i nh\u1eefng kh\u00f3 kh\u0103n v\u1ec1 m\u1eb7t chia s\u1ebb v\u00e0 th\u00f4ng c\u1ea3m. N\u00f3i theo v\u0103n ch\u01b0\u01a1ng b\u00ecnh d\u00e2n l\u00e0 h\u1ecd \u201ckh\u1eafc kh\u1ea9u\u201d. C\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u00e3 kh\u00f4ng \u0111i qua nh\u1eefng c\u1eeda s\u1ed5 t\u00e2m h\u1ed3n \u0111\u1ec3 b\u01b0\u1edbc v\u00e0o \u0111\u1eddi nhau, nh\u01b0ng ch\u1ec9 d\u00f9ng c\u1ea3m x\u00fac, ho\u1eb7c ch\u1ee7 quan c\u1ee7a l\u00fd tr\u00ed \u0111\u1ec3 ph\u00e1n \u0111o\u00e1n v\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed1i x\u1eed v\u1edbi nhau. Do \u0111\u00f3, h\u1ecd c\u1ea7n h\u1ecdc c\u00e1ch hi\u1ec3u v\u00e0 c\u1ea3m th\u00f4ng v\u1edbi nhau xuy\u00ean qua nh\u1eefng c\u00e1nh c\u1eeda c\u1ee7a t\u00e2m h\u1ed3n.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

T\u00d4N TR\u1eccNG V\u00c0 B\u00c0N H\u1eceI TRONG T\u1eeaNG V\u1ea4N \u0110\u1ec0 TR\u01af\u1edaC KHI QUY\u1ebeT \u0110\u1ecaNH TS Tr\u1ea7n M\u1ef9 Duy\u1ec7t Ch\u1ed3ng c\u1ee7a em r\u1ea5t th\u01b0\u01a1ng y\u00eau em v\u00e0 lo l\u1eafng cho gia \u0111\u00ecnh, nh\u01b0ng anh \u1ea5y c\u00f3 th\u00f3i quen th\u00edch c\u00e1i g\u00ec l\u00e0 t\u1ef1 \u0111i l\u00e0m m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng b\u00e0n h\u1ecfi v\u1edbi em m\u1ed9t\u0111\u1ecdc ti\u1ebfp…<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5047,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[12,57],"tags":[116,125],"class_list":["entry","author-ntviet","post-5040","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-chuyenmuc","category-giaoduc-vanhoc-lichsu","tag-giao-duc","tag-hon-nhan"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5040","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5040"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5040\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/5047"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5040"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5040"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/vanhoimoi.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5040"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}